How Couples Counseling Can Help You Before You Get Married
Posted on: 2 December 2017
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Couples counseling is helpful at any stage of a relationship, but it is especially useful prior to marriage. Premarital counseling helps identify problems that could arise and teaches you how to communicate more effectively. Here are some of the ways couples counseling helps you before you tie the knot.
You'll Learn How To Compromise
One thing you'll do in couples therapy realize each partner's priorities. You may want kids right away but your partner may want to wait a few years. Counseling helps you understand each view so you don't secretly hope you will get your way after you're married. You'll be taught how to come to a comprise on major life decisions so both partners are happy with the results. You can reach some of the compromises before you get married and then you'll have the skills needed to reach agreements as your relationship grows over the years.
You'll Learn Communication Skills
Poor communication is a big issue in many relationships. If you've never been taught how to communicate effectively, you may not even know the mistakes you're making or that there is a better way to communicate with your partner. Learning how to listen and how to respond when you're angry will help you avoid major arguments, anger, and resentments. You won't always agree with your spouse, but when you have the tools to argue effectively, you can clear up issues without causing harm to your relationship.
You'll Heal Hidden Resentments
If your relationship has wounds that cause the same old arguments to come up, counseling can help. If your spouse was unfaithful, you may have trust issues now. You don't want to start a marriage on a shaky foundation. Counseling helps you process the old resentments so they are cleared out of your system and you enter the marriage ready to trust and give it your all. Counseling also helps your partner realize ways to earn your trust and to identify behaviors that could trigger problems in your relationship. Although you may be anxious to have a big wedding and be married, you don't want to go into a marriage until present and past issues have been healed.
You'll Manage Your Expectations
If you haven't lived with your partner before marriage, you may have unrealistic expectations of how life will be once you're married. It's important to have an idea of what to expect when it comes to your role in the marriage and what day-to-day life will be like. You may romanticize it in your mind and then be disappointed when mundane things like work, laundry, housekeeping, and meal preparation take up all your time. Keeping expectations realistic helps you avoid resenting your spouse or yourself for not being able to maintain a romantic and glamorous life all the time.
Premarital couples counseling is worth considering, no matter your age and past marital status. You may not need lengthy sessions. Your counselor will tell after one or two meetings if you're both in sync when it comes to expectations, communication skills, and future goals. No matter how long it takes, improving your relationship before marriage can only pay off once you're living together while balancing careers and family.
Visit a site like http://thecenterforfamilycounseling.com/ for more help.